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note to self: i’ll be there for you, always

written june 6, 2021. Photo by Kristine Cinate on Unsplash I have always looked for myself in other people. I think the idea was that they would somehow hold the pieces of me that I felt were missing. That maybe, if I wrapped my identity up in theirs enough, we would somehow make a whole person. It's not healthy to live like this, but I did it anyway — burning through relationships and searching for something I couldn't quite name. It was never enough, not to be myself, but it was never enough to latch my identity to other people, either. I got close, several times — I thought I had reached the pinnacle of self discovery. I thought I had completed myself. But in the end, relying on other people to help build yourself is never a viable way to do things. It's only recently that I've started to become comfortable with the idea of being enough, as I am, on my own. Several years ago, in this same position, I would have searched for another person to attach my identity onto,

Rainy Day {Day 11: A Recent Photo}

It's raining outside. I actually had no idea it was possible to rain in February. I missed the rain. Usually, I like rain better than snow. As long as I don't have anything to do, rain is amazing.

It brings back good memories. One time, I was having a really bad day, and my friend told me to go laugh hysterically in the rain. I couldn't do it because of the lightning, but it still brightened my day. :) Later, when we met in person, it ended up raining - so we were able to laugh hysterically in the rain together. :D Thinking about those times makes me not feel so overcast.

If I wasn't so comfortable inside, I'd go outside and take pictures. I've always wanted to capture rain on film. There are so many things I want to capture on film, but I can't because it just wouldn't be the same as experiencing it in real life.

Okay, onto the blog challenge.
day 1: a favorite song.
day 2: a favorite movie.
day 3: a favorite book.
day 4: a favorite television program.
day 5: a favorite quote.
day 6: a moment you wish you could relive.
day 7: five things you couldn't possibly live without.
day 8: a thank you letter to someone who has changed your life.
day 9: a photo you took.
day 10: a photo of you taken over ten years ago.
day 11: a photo of you taken recently.
day 12: a song that you want played at your wedding(or was played).
day 13: a guilty pleasure.
day 14: a vacation you would like to take.
day 15: a person you admire.
day 16: a song that makes you cry.
day 17: an art piece.
day 18: a time when you felt passionate and alive.
day 19: a talent of yours.
day 20: a hobby of yours.
day 21: something you know you do differently than most people.
day 22: a website.
day 23: a way in which you want to be remembered.
day 24: a movie no one would expect you to love.
day 25: a recipe.
day 26: a childhood memory.
day 27: a physical feature you love.
day 28: hopes, dreams and plans you have for the next 365 days

So, here's the thing. I"m a no-face blogger. That means that, aside from yesterday's photos, I will probably never show a picture of my whole face. Partials are okay, but full on pictures aren't. So, I decided to post a sort of picture of me.

This picture was taken very recently - yesterday, in fact. That's about as recent as I could get. My brother and I were taking pictures like crazy - he was using my camera, and I was using my dad's. We both snapped a picture of each other at the same time. I love using my Dad's camera - it makes me feel so official! :)

And then of course, there's this one.
:)

Comments

  1. cute pictures! I know you are gorgeous even though I can't see your face :)

    much love,
    Samarah♥

    ReplyDelete

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