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note to self: i’ll be there for you, always

written june 6, 2021. Photo by Kristine Cinate on Unsplash I have always looked for myself in other people. I think the idea was that they would somehow hold the pieces of me that I felt were missing. That maybe, if I wrapped my identity up in theirs enough, we would somehow make a whole person. It's not healthy to live like this, but I did it anyway — burning through relationships and searching for something I couldn't quite name. It was never enough, not to be myself, but it was never enough to latch my identity to other people, either. I got close, several times — I thought I had reached the pinnacle of self discovery. I thought I had completed myself. But in the end, relying on other people to help build yourself is never a viable way to do things. It's only recently that I've started to become comfortable with the idea of being enough, as I am, on my own. Several years ago, in this same position, I would have searched for another person to attach my identity onto,

Blog World, Meet My NaNo Novel

I can officially say without a doubt, that this is my favorite Beautiful People round ever, as evidenced by the fact that I couldn't wait to put this post up. I've enjoyed reading about all your novels, and I'm amazed by how creative we all are! Writers, I think you all deserve a high-five. :)

As for me, here is my contribution to this month's edition of Beautiful People.

1. Sum up your novel in five words or less.
Blacksmith, sister, pain, adventure, hope.

2. Novel title?
Silver Tears

3. Sum up your main character(s) in one word each.
Gavin Gray: Determined. Riah: Forgiven. Torin: Roguish.

4. Advice for newbies in three words?
Don't think. Write.

5. Tell us about your secondary characters, how do they affect the story?
Well, considering one of them falls sick and forces her brother to leave behind everything he holds dear, I'd say that's pretty significant, don't you?

6. Do you plan to stay up till midnight on the 31st?
Hmmm... possibly. I'd like to, but it's a school night and when I stay up, I'm usually not good for much the next day. So we'll have to see.

7. How many years have you done NaNo?
Technically, three, but the first year I didn't win. Well, I did win, but I did the YWP (Young Writer's Program). I aimed for 25k, and ended up with 30k, so it was a good year.

Last year I started out with the YWP program, and ended up hitting 50k in the last week by writing 25k in a few days. It was... um, crazy to say the least. I'd rather not repeat that incident, which is why I'm planning ahead this year. :P

8. What came first, characters, or plot idea?
Let's see. Characters... definitely characters. In fact, I had Gavin Gray long before I ever came up with the plot idea. You may have heard of him before, actually... here and here.

As for Chasiel and Torin, they have been around for years, it seems. I came up with Chasiel by stealing the name from Georgie, who has since discarded it, and she helped me come up with the name Torin as well. They're related, and Torin adores Chasiel like a sister.

My characters helped determine the plot idea, and I'm actually amazed that I have a full, mostly developed plot. Wonder of wonders!

9. How much prep do you do before November?
A moderate amount. This year my goal is to keep my plot structured, but have a little elbow room to be creative. I've outlined my prologue and first chapter so far, and I have 10 days to outline the rest. Wish me luck.

10. Now be honest, how do you really feel about NaNo?
Nervous, excited, terrified, and full of anticipation. In other words, I just summed up the entire NaNo experience.

What about you? Have you joined Beautiful People yet? Are you doing NaNo? If you answered yes to either of these questions, click here to get started.

And I'd love to hear your thoughts. Comments are what make the world go 'round... or is it dark chocolate? O.o


  1. That was awesome! I want to read your novel now :D

    Have a great November, girlfriend! And heehee, I am foolishly undertaking the Great BP challenge..... I probably won't be done until next year! jk ;)

  2. Sounds awesome, Sky! :] I really want to do it this year, but I am pretty sure I won't have time...:/ I have SO much school, music stuff, and running to do..I just don't think I can. :.( I am still writing, though, when I get the chance!

  3. So cool! That's great that you already have a good outline - you're way ahead of me!! =D Can't wait for November 1st...


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