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on the power of showing up

note: I wrote this post in April of 2019 (pre-COVID). It's been sitting in my drafts for quite a while, but I think it's time for it to see the light of day. It's been helpful for me to reread over the past few months, especially as I continue to try to make an effort to write, and I hope it can be helpful to you, too. i got an invite to a writers' group a few months ago, and i had never felt like more of a fraud in my life. it had been months, if not years, since i'd felt like a writer. the proverbial well of words in my heart had dried up, it seemed, and i wasn't sure if it was ever coming back. i agreed to go out of a sense of helplessness—i'd identified as a writer ever since i could remember. if i'm not a writer, who am i?  i told myself that it was important to show up and act like a writer even when i didn't feel like one, because even though i hadn't been writing, i reassured myself, i still was a writer. but sometimes the words f
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Problems of the Two-Dimensional Variety

(The classic writer's face.)
Lately I've been having problems of the two-dimensional variety. Any writer would know what I'm talking about. They're called characters.


After NaNoWriMo, I couldn't figure out what I hated most about my novel, called Chandler and Paislee. The plot was amazing, at least I thought so. Even though it had taken a few detours, that could easily fixed and put back on track.

I didn't think the plot was too bad. I tried writing on a daily basis so I could get my free CreateSpace proof copy of my novel. But I was running into walls every time I sat down at my keyboard. And then it hit me.

The problem was my characters.

I thought I had them figured out, but somewhere along the line they surprised me. They surprised me in that I didn't know them as well as I thought I did. I had barely developed them before diving into the story, and in the long run, they ended up fake. Boring. Two-dimensional.

So, I have no idea what to do. Honestly, I have no interest in the story. I want to pitch it out the window and forget about it. For now. I do believe God gave me this plot, and it has potential to impact many lives. But I think this story needs some time to ripen and simmer in my mind until I have the maturity to handle the deep concepts this novel involves. I'll let God impress on my heart the need to write this story - when it's time. But for now, I'm not ready.

As far as my CreateSpace novel goes, I'm going to get it. Just not with Chandler & Paislee. I have a story (Reese's Pieces, for those who've read my writing projects page). I've been writing it since August, and it has made me smile, laugh, and cry. Compared to C&P, my characters are real. Three-dimensional. And the story means a lot to me. I'm currently at about 56k, and I'm reaching the end. And I'd love to have a real, honest-to-goodness copy of this book to hold my hands. A copy that's three-dimensional.

Just like some of my characters.
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  1. iGirlJanuary 28, 2011 at 5:40 AM

    Cool! Good luck with it Kylie!

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  2. WrenJanuary 30, 2011 at 6:33 PM

    Hey Sky!
    I just wanted to say good luck on your books, I'm sorry to hear that C&P didn't work out very well, for now. But, I am very excited to read the full copy of Reese's Pieces when it arrives!

    Love,
    ~Wren

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  3. iGirlJanuary 30, 2011 at 7:00 PM

    Oh, I know this is kind of random, but can I copy your What I'm Writing idea with word counts and stuff? I saw it and thought it was really cool. I'll say that it was your idea, I was just wondering if it was okay.

    Thanks,
    iGirl

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