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note to self: i’ll be there for you, always

written june 6, 2021. Photo by Kristine Cinate on Unsplash I have always looked for myself in other people. I think the idea was that they would somehow hold the pieces of me that I felt were missing. That maybe, if I wrapped my identity up in theirs enough, we would somehow make a whole person. It's not healthy to live like this, but I did it anyway — burning through relationships and searching for something I couldn't quite name. It was never enough, not to be myself, but it was never enough to latch my identity to other people, either. I got close, several times — I thought I had reached the pinnacle of self discovery. I thought I had completed myself. But in the end, relying on other people to help build yourself is never a viable way to do things. It's only recently that I've started to become comfortable with the idea of being enough, as I am, on my own. Several years ago, in this same position, I would have searched for another person to attach my identity onto,

Heart Update: Part 2

As some of you may know, my grandpa had his heart surgery on Monday. I am so glad that I get to tell you things went really, really well. They had no complications that I know of, and all the hospital staff say he's very healthy. As of today he was awake in the ICU and talking softly, although he's a bit sore and in pain. Please be praying that his pain lessens, and that his recovery process goes well.

Thank you so much for all the prayers already. I can't tell you how much they mean to me.

*group hug!*


  1. YAYAYAYAYAY! I'm so happy for all of you! I've been praying :)

  2. Hullo Mountie!

    Hurrah! SO very glad to hear that about your grandfather! :) I will definitely be praying that he gets relief from the pain and a smooth, blessed recovery!

    ~ Mal


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