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note to self: i’ll be there for you, always

written june 6, 2021. Photo by Kristine Cinate on Unsplash I have always looked for myself in other people. I think the idea was that they would somehow hold the pieces of me that I felt were missing. That maybe, if I wrapped my identity up in theirs enough, we would somehow make a whole person. It's not healthy to live like this, but I did it anyway — burning through relationships and searching for something I couldn't quite name. It was never enough, not to be myself, but it was never enough to latch my identity to other people, either. I got close, several times — I thought I had reached the pinnacle of self discovery. I thought I had completed myself. But in the end, relying on other people to help build yourself is never a viable way to do things. It's only recently that I've started to become comfortable with the idea of being enough, as I am, on my own. Several years ago, in this same position, I would have searched for another person to attach my identity onto,

please pray


One of my dear friends has a little brother named Noah who has been struggling his whole life with a mitochondrial disorder. This disorder is very serious and has no cure. He's only five years old and has already been through so much.

He's been in and out of the hospital a lot, but as of today, he is very sick. I was just IM'ed by his older sister who told me that he's not responding to medication. This may mean that his kidneys are failing. They'll try again one more time, but if he doesn't respond, this means they have 2-3 days with him at the most. Please, please be praying for this precious family however you feel led.

They have a blog if you want more info:


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