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note to self: i’ll be there for you, always

written june 6, 2021. Photo by Kristine Cinate on Unsplash I have always looked for myself in other people. I think the idea was that they would somehow hold the pieces of me that I felt were missing. That maybe, if I wrapped my identity up in theirs enough, we would somehow make a whole person. It's not healthy to live like this, but I did it anyway — burning through relationships and searching for something I couldn't quite name. It was never enough, not to be myself, but it was never enough to latch my identity to other people, either. I got close, several times — I thought I had reached the pinnacle of self discovery. I thought I had completed myself. But in the end, relying on other people to help build yourself is never a viable way to do things. It's only recently that I've started to become comfortable with the idea of being enough, as I am, on my own. Several years ago, in this same position, I would have searched for another person to attach my identity onto,

To Those Who Are Searching

I won't deny it: I get some really, really weird referrals from Google. The search terms that people use when finding my site are nothing more than extraordinary, and sometimes, they're just plain weird.

I've decided to offer an apology to those who have searched and have not found.


Dear person who searched for "keep calm and call batman shirt",

I do not sell that shirt, I'm afraid. I am but a lowly blogger amongst the blogosphere who just happened to blog about it. The post in question that you probably found is, admittedly, rather stupid, and it probably doesn't help all that much. I'm not sure why you ended up here of all places, since I don't really talk about Batman on my blog all that often, and when I do, it usually has something to do with weird dreams and Polyvore sets. Nevertheless, I highly support your search for a place to purchase the Keep Calm and Call Batman shirt! Let me know when you find what you're looking for!

-Miss Polyvore


Dear person who searched for "damian mcginty barefoot",

Simply put, you baffle me, and so does Google. I honestly have no idea why those search terms led to my blog, and I apologize for the inconvenience. The only thing I found that seemed remotely helpful is this post, where I just happened to mention Damian McGinty and the word barefoot in the same post. It's fitting because the title of the post is Awkwardly Awesome. I can't decide whether this search term is awesome, or just plain awkward. I'm leaning towards the latter.



Dear person who searched for "hanging cups white",

Somehow, you ended up here, and I have no idea why. All I can say is... huh???

-Even More Confused


Dear person who searched for "owl city wedding song",

I believe I may have misled you. To my knowledge, Owl City has not produced a wedding song. However, I do talk about him on my blog quite often, and I did happen to mention that I may want to have his song played at my wedding. This is probably how you have gotten to my blog. You can find the source of this confusing mix-up here. Once again, I apologize.

-A Misleading Hoot Owl


Dear person who searched for "yellow ice cream truck with a bright smile",


-I'm Still Confused


Dear person who searched for "further up and further in blog",

Your search terms are quite normal, and you are in the right place. Thank you for visiting. :)



  1. OH OH OH OH!!!! TOUCHE!!!!! I loved this...sometimes Google has the weirdest ideas....


  2. haha so funny!! Oh and FYI- I'm going to look for a "Keep Calm and Call Batman" shirt. yep, never knew they existed till now. Well i hope they do. ;)

    much love♥

  3. I've gotten some odd referalls

    tumblr teenage photography
    finn mcmissile and fire
    finn mcmissile shooting lemons

    shooting lemons? O_o.

  4. Bahahahaha! This. Is. EPIC. I LOVE IT! :D
    Totally awesome. Very creative. Hilarious. Etc. Etc.
    I decided to look up my own, and these are some of the best ones. :)

    "penguin boiled eggs" Believe it or not, this kinda makes sense. I made a post once about hard boiled eggs that look like penguins. :D

    "half donkey half zebra" Ummm a zedonk? Yes, it is a real animal. But I only posted ONE pic of one ONCE. So yeah. Weird that it led to, uh, ... me.

    "make a t-shirt into a messenger bag" I have NEVER done that. Sure I made a messenger bag once, but really? Not out of a t-shirt. Come on, Google! Get it right, dude.

    "umbrella mary poppins" OK, this one makes sense. I did make an umbrella that looked like Mary Poppin's umbrella once. *sigh* Kfine. I'll give you this one, Google. Ya got me.

    "cutest little bare feet"
    Uhhh ... O_o
    So umm, does this mean I have cute feet or ...? I, uh, hmm. I got nothin' ...
    Just, uh, nope. Nothin'. *Shakes head*

    "walmart cashiers" Seriously? You googled that and got to my blog?? Dude. I've only mentioned walmart cashiers once in my blog. Way to pick up on it, Google! Now THAT'S talent.

    Oh, brother.

    Thank you for introducing me to this highly amusing pass time.

  5. *bwahahahaha*

    That. Was. Awesome. :D

  6. Haha, these sure do make good ideas for posting!


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