note to self: i’ll be there for you, always
written june 6, 2021. Photo by Kristine Cinate on Unsplash I have always looked for myself in other people. I think the idea was that they would somehow hold the pieces of me that I felt were missing. That maybe, if I wrapped my identity up in theirs enough, we would somehow make a whole person. It's not healthy to live like this, but I did it anyway — burning through relationships and searching for something I couldn't quite name. It was never enough, not to be myself, but it was never enough to latch my identity to other people, either. I got close, several times — I thought I had reached the pinnacle of self discovery. I thought I had completed myself. But in the end, relying on other people to help build yourself is never a viable way to do things. It's only recently that I've started to become comfortable with the idea of being enough, as I am, on my own. Several years ago, in this same position, I would have searched for another person to attach my identity onto,
It almost creeps me out that you're turning sixteen next year. What do you know what "really" creeps me out? I'm going to be 18 in 7 months and I'll be able to vote in the next election. .... that scares me! :P
ReplyDeleteLove you!
~Ash
(0h! You know what we need? We need a button for our blog! :) Ashen Sky Life,I mean!)
Yes, I do like script writing.
ReplyDeleteNo, I haven't made one that's 100 pages long. Wow.
No, it wasn't close. It was 22 pages long
Yes, it was handwritten
Yes, I made a little movie with it
Yes, other people acted in it.
No, no one got paid.
No, it wasn't film length it was half an hour.
That's all for my script writing experience. Yours sounds super cool, I could never do one that's 100 pages long!!! You girls are so inspiring :)