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note to self: i’ll be there for you, always

written june 6, 2021. Photo by Kristine Cinate on Unsplash I have always looked for myself in other people. I think the idea was that they would somehow hold the pieces of me that I felt were missing. That maybe, if I wrapped my identity up in theirs enough, we would somehow make a whole person. It's not healthy to live like this, but I did it anyway — burning through relationships and searching for something I couldn't quite name. It was never enough, not to be myself, but it was never enough to latch my identity to other people, either. I got close, several times — I thought I had reached the pinnacle of self discovery. I thought I had completed myself. But in the end, relying on other people to help build yourself is never a viable way to do things. It's only recently that I've started to become comfortable with the idea of being enough, as I am, on my own. Several years ago, in this same position, I would have searched for another person to attach my identity onto,

Won't Let Me Go

 I love the harmonies and style of this song. The lyrics are AMAZING! I can relate... a lot. :) Go listen to it here!


Addison Road - Let Me Go
Welcome to my latest disaster
Same book just another chapter
I never thought it could be worse then last year
But here I am again today
I laugh 'cause it hurts when I scream
But I'll make it through 'cause I believe

Chorus:

That even when my heart breaks
And everything's shaken
I'm left alone in the rain
You won't, you won't, won't
You won't let me go
When life's insane
And everything's crazy
You carry me through the pain
And you won't, you won't, won't
You won't let me go


Here we go it's a three-ring circus
Juggling it all, trying to find my purpose
With each new day, I'm praying just to make it through
When my next disaster is near
I know that you'll meet me right here

Chorus:
That even when my heart breaks
And everything's shaken
I'm left alone in the rain
You won't, you won't, won't
You won't let me go
When life's insane
And everything's crazy
You carry me through the pain
And you won't, you won't, won't
You won't let me go


I feel your love that surrounds me
My world can shake but it won't drown me
'Cause I'm trusting you
No matter what I'm going through


Chorus:
That even when my heart breaks
And everything's shaken
I'm left alone in the rain
You won't, you won't, won't
You won't let me go
When life's insane
And everything's crazy
You carry me through the pain
And you won't, you won't, won't
You won't let me go

P.S. - a post is coming soon about what's going on in my life right now. It's probably going to be titled Bathrooms, Basses, and Babysitting. Or something like that. Oh, and go check out my new about me page while you're waiting!

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