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note to self: i’ll be there for you, always

written june 6, 2021. Photo by Kristine Cinate on Unsplash I have always looked for myself in other people. I think the idea was that they would somehow hold the pieces of me that I felt were missing. That maybe, if I wrapped my identity up in theirs enough, we would somehow make a whole person. It's not healthy to live like this, but I did it anyway — burning through relationships and searching for something I couldn't quite name. It was never enough, not to be myself, but it was never enough to latch my identity to other people, either. I got close, several times — I thought I had reached the pinnacle of self discovery. I thought I had completed myself. But in the end, relying on other people to help build yourself is never a viable way to do things. It's only recently that I've started to become comfortable with the idea of being enough, as I am, on my own. Several years ago, in this same position, I would have searched for another person to attach my identity onto,

I am here...sorta

Wow! Life has been CRAZY!

Okay, I know. I say that a lot. But this time it really has been!

I'm tired... *stares dismally into her empty coffee cup*

Here's a little math question for you.

What does 3 graduations + 1 crazy sleepover + 3 days of randomly driving around all over the world* + 1 day getting lost in the mountains equal?

One tired hobbit.

* slight exaggeration may occur.

Comments

  1. hehehe, I hope you feel better soon!
    Blessings,
    Meggie

    ReplyDelete
  2. It sounds great! We just had a sleepover with SmartyJones, and it was totally awesome.

    I definitely need to come to your blog more often. ;)

    ReplyDelete

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