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note to self: i’ll be there for you, always

written june 6, 2021. Photo by Kristine Cinate on Unsplash I have always looked for myself in other people. I think the idea was that they would somehow hold the pieces of me that I felt were missing. That maybe, if I wrapped my identity up in theirs enough, we would somehow make a whole person. It's not healthy to live like this, but I did it anyway — burning through relationships and searching for something I couldn't quite name. It was never enough, not to be myself, but it was never enough to latch my identity to other people, either. I got close, several times — I thought I had reached the pinnacle of self discovery. I thought I had completed myself. But in the end, relying on other people to help build yourself is never a viable way to do things. It's only recently that I've started to become comfortable with the idea of being enough, as I am, on my own. Several years ago, in this same position, I would have searched for another person to attach my identity onto,
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A Writer’s Guide to Not Writing


As writers, I feel that most of us are very familiar with a little thing called not-writing. Another name for this is...

Procrastination.

I don't know about you, but here are the five things I use the most to aid me in the art of Not Writing.


1. Pinterest


This one is tricky because you can still sort of convince yourself that you’re writing. If you pin stuff related to your novels, it’s much easier to allow yourself to continue not-writing.

2. Netflix


It’s too easy to binge-watch. (Oh, I’m totally going to stop after this episode, said everyone ever. Oh, let me turn off the TV now, said no one ever.)


3. Tumblr (or your social media of choice)


I don't even think I need to elaborate.


4. Excuses


This can be anything from "Meh, you deserve a break," to, "You can write more later, just chill for right now."


5. The elusive "tomorrow."


I always believe I will start tomorrow, which is a bald-faced lie.


Spoiler alert: It never happens.



I feel like Shia LaBeouf has a very good point. Be right back, I'm going to go make my dreams come true.

How about you? What's your #1 favorite way to procrastinate?


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  1. Tracey JosephDecember 10, 2015 at 5:46 AM

    Yup! This post made me laugh. All of these are so very true. We love to procrastinate.

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  2. Victoria Grace HowellDecember 11, 2015 at 11:01 AM

    This is funny. XD I've definitely used these methods to procrastinate. One of my biggest goals for the latter half of this year has been to NOT procrastinate and my life has benefited so much from it. Procrastinating got me into a tangled mess of stress in the summer.

    storitorigrace.blogspot.com

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    1. Sky DestrianDecember 11, 2015 at 2:37 PM

      Agreed, it's been one of my goals too. It definitely helps a lot. When I do procrastinate, I also turn into a tangled mess of stress. So I totally get where you're coming from. XD Thanks for stopping by!

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  3. VloraJanuary 6, 2016 at 7:01 PM

    I love that Shia LaBeouf meme haha HE'S RIGHT DAMMIT. I do ALL THE THINGS EVER to procrastinate. Like, I can't even blame anything, because if I weren't watching TV shows, I'd be reading a book, and if I weren't reading a book, I'd be writing a post, replying to comments, commenting back, editing a video, or - and this is not an exaggeration - straight out stare at the wall to avoid doing the thing I should actually be doing. So, yes, I am very familiar with this concept :D

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