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note to self: i’ll be there for you, always

written june 6, 2021. Photo by Kristine Cinate on Unsplash I have always looked for myself in other people. I think the idea was that they would somehow hold the pieces of me that I felt were missing. That maybe, if I wrapped my identity up in theirs enough, we would somehow make a whole person. It's not healthy to live like this, but I did it anyway — burning through relationships and searching for something I couldn't quite name. It was never enough, not to be myself, but it was never enough to latch my identity to other people, either. I got close, several times — I thought I had reached the pinnacle of self discovery. I thought I had completed myself. But in the end, relying on other people to help build yourself is never a viable way to do things. It's only recently that I've started to become comfortable with the idea of being enough, as I am, on my own. Several years ago, in this same position, I would have searched for another person to attach my identity onto,

tonight, we are young

so if by the time, the bar closes, and you feel like falling down
i'll carry you home
tonight








i've gotten some new clothing as of yesterday. don't let these pictures fool you. while i did buy some girly tops, i went to the mens section and raided their graphic tees. included in this stash is an iron man t-shirt, one that says "trust me, i'm a superhero", and a t-shirt that says "BAZINGA!" (from the big bang theory.)

but i also bought this t-shirt, which makes me feel marvelous. i know some people aren't a huge fan of stripes, but i beg to differ. i love them. it's all in how the clothes make you feel, anyway. 

two people, one being my sister, told me i looked "sailor-ish." i am surprisingly okay with that.

Comments

  1. I LOVE STRIPES. Seriously, every shirt of mine is either a) superheroes or b) stripey. ;) Except comic/slogan shirts in Australia are always suckishly expensive. I snoop for them in 2nd hand stores.

    But, gawsh don't you look PURTY. XD

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  2. Stripes are the best! Especially black and white...hehehe, I have to resist buying black and white striped clothing because I have too many.

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  3. You are so adorable!

    While I was looking through these pictures I was thinking, "Oh my goodness, I love her clothes!" without even knowing you were going to talk about them. Stripes is one of my favoritest things to wear EVER! It's ridiculous how much I buy striped shirts. They're the best! And sailor clothes are awesome, just so you know.

    Hope you're doing well. I've been keeping you in my prayers.

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  4. Awesome! Stripes are the best, especially navy blue ones. Navy blue anything is always good.
    "Trust me, I'm a superhero," that sounds like an awesome T-shirt. :)

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  5. I love stripes and graphic tees too! Oh, and btw, CUTE glasses!!

    ReplyDelete

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