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note to self: i’ll be there for you, always

written june 6, 2021. Photo by Kristine Cinate on Unsplash I have always looked for myself in other people. I think the idea was that they would somehow hold the pieces of me that I felt were missing. That maybe, if I wrapped my identity up in theirs enough, we would somehow make a whole person. It's not healthy to live like this, but I did it anyway — burning through relationships and searching for something I couldn't quite name. It was never enough, not to be myself, but it was never enough to latch my identity to other people, either. I got close, several times — I thought I had reached the pinnacle of self discovery. I thought I had completed myself. But in the end, relying on other people to help build yourself is never a viable way to do things. It's only recently that I've started to become comfortable with the idea of being enough, as I am, on my own. Several years ago, in this same position, I would have searched for another person to attach my identity onto,
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The Dance

Life is so crazy.

Life is... life.

Thoughts are swirling around in my brain. I just honestly don't know what to say.

Life has been so crazy.

Life has been...life.

Life is life. God is good. Life is life, God is good. I need to remind myself of this...often.

Lately I've been feeling spiritually dry, and I've noticed that several other bloggers have, too. I was so surprised when I came across Abigail's post, Bekah's post, and Hannah's post, all in the same week, when I've been struggling with the same thing. God works in mysterious ways, no?

So, even now, a few weeks later, I still feel dry. But my viewpoint is a little different. One thing I really took away from the posts I linked above was that life is a dance. We're dancing in a field...with Jesus. With sunshine. With light. With love. Oh my goodness. The thought of it makes my heart want to sing.

Even though life won't necessarily stop, we can still slow down and remember. Remember that life is a dance. With Jesus. With love. Sometimes the music is slow, sometimes it's fast. Sometimes life goes past slowly, sometimes it's fast. But one thing never changes. We're still dancing...with Jesus. And as long as we remember that, we can always come back to Him, feeling safe in His arms as we continue the dance. A beautiful dance. Of light. Of love.

Even when the storm clouds come, we'll dance in the rain. We'll bask in the joy on sunshiny days. And Jesus will remain constant. Forever.

Jesus is waiting. Run to the field. Meet Him there. Join the dance.
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  1. BekahApril 11, 2010 at 2:09 PM

    Yes, my dear Kylie. Yes, yes, yes. Life is a DANCE! And we are dancing with Christ! What a GLORIOUS thought! :)

    Let's continue dancing, shall we?

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  2. Abigail KraftApril 13, 2010 at 10:19 AM

    Beautimous, Kylie! So true! I actually wrote a post about something similar a couple of years ago (similar, but not exactly the same). You can read it here.

    You are absolutely right...life IS a dance! A dance with our Savior! And no matter what strange twists our humanity takes us down, we're still in His arms! What a magnificent assurance!

    Thank you for sharing this post with me!
    --Abigail

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