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note to self: i’ll be there for you, always

written june 6, 2021. Photo by Kristine Cinate on Unsplash I have always looked for myself in other people. I think the idea was that they would somehow hold the pieces of me that I felt were missing. That maybe, if I wrapped my identity up in theirs enough, we would somehow make a whole person. It's not healthy to live like this, but I did it anyway — burning through relationships and searching for something I couldn't quite name. It was never enough, not to be myself, but it was never enough to latch my identity to other people, either. I got close, several times — I thought I had reached the pinnacle of self discovery. I thought I had completed myself. But in the end, relying on other people to help build yourself is never a viable way to do things. It's only recently that I've started to become comfortable with the idea of being enough, as I am, on my own. Several years ago, in this same position, I would have searched for another person to attach my identity onto,

Lame Confessions of a Music Junkie

Current song in my head: When violet eyes get brighter, and heavy wings grow lighter, I'll taste the sky and feel alive again....
{I just love Owl City. :)}


Okay, this is going to sound tacky, but I've been listening to the same three songs over and over again every day for the past week.


Wanna know what they are?



I feel bad saying this, but this is one of my favorite songs and I don't even know why since I never even saw the movie Space Jam (reportedly, it stunk). This song is annoying and it gets stuck in your head. But maybe that's why I love it. 

On a side note, it is also the only song to inspire me to play my bass guitar (due to the stinking awesome bass line throughout the whole song... just in case you were wondering, I have listened to this song a LOT.) By the way, here is my bass. I think I forgot to post about getting him a couple months back. His name is Ben. (see right.)

Ben is awesome. But I'll save that for a later post.

Moving on to song #2...


This song is awesome. Hands down, end of story. I was first introduced to it when my local Christian radio station started playing it. That was a couple years ago, so this song has been ingrained in my mind for a while. While the band Lifehouse isn't under a Christian label, the people who are in the band are Christians and put their faith in a lot of songs. Which I think is awesome.

To me, I take this song a lot of times as a love letter from God to me. Yes, I know it wasn't written as that kind of a song, it's really about a girl, ladeda. But the point of music is to let it speak to your soul. That's all I'm letting it do. And God loves me as much more than any guy ever will, so really, it's the ultimate love song.

I can also play it on my acoustic guitar whose name is to be announced. I really should write about my instruments some day.

Last but not least on our line up...


This song has a story scarily similar to number 2. I also heard it on my Christian radio station a while back (think: when I was 10). At that time, I had no idea who it was by. Now I've come to learn it's by Switchfoot. Switchfoot has come to be one of my favorite bands. They are also like Lifehouse in that while they aren't under a Christian label, they are singing for God and that's all that matters.

This song is a good reminder to take a step back and really look at your life. The main point of your song (in case you didn't catch it by the title) is that everything will soon be gone and there's so much more to life than what your eyes can see. It's a reminder that I need... often. Not to mention this song has awesome vocals, awesome guitars, awesome drums, awesome lyrics... okay, I'm done now.

BUT WAIT! There is actually a 4th song. I don't listen to this one nearly as much, but it speaks to my soul every time. The real version is here, but the string arrangement stirs emotions deep within me that I didn't even know existed. Go ahead, give it a listen. But you might cry. Don't say I didn't warn you. 

Speaking of crying at music, there are a lot of songs I've cried at lately... but that's a whole other blog post. ;)

Signing off for now,
-Your Resident Music Junkie



Comments

  1. Ben is like, totally sucking up all the attention he's getting since you posted his picture all over the internet. First comes the blog... then youtube... he's probably dreaming about the tours he'll be making down the road...

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  2. It is even more important for a King not to look scruffy, then a Prince not to look scruffy. Caspain looked scruffy imho. :P

    Tell Ben I'll buy his CD the day it comes out... oh... he didn't tell you about that? My bad. Sorry Ben.

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  3. Would it be illegal if I only followed you because you like owl city too??? Hahaha... I'm a switchfoot fan as well so I think we'll get along just fine.

    Unfortunetly blogger won't let me follow anyone else because I've reached the limit *gah* but I'll read!!!

    xx,
    Bleah

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  4. i *heart* both of those songs! :) lifehouse is ahhmazing & switchfoot is epic!

    thanks for following me! i'm now following you as well.

    blessings always & forever,
    anna :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Love it!!! I only know the first and 3rd songs, but they're good songs!! Music geeks, unite! :)

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  6. Hey Sky! I just found your blog from Anna's.. I LOVE it! Ooh, you play me guitar. Me too. Do you write your own songs? Congrats on NaNo, by the way! I did it last year, but... I totally gave up after a few days this year. I couldn't be bothered. :P

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  7. I like Owl City's silky voice. ;D No, but he does have a nice sounding voice. ^_^

    Merry Christmas!

    ReplyDelete

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