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note to self: i’ll be there for you, always

written june 6, 2021. Photo by Kristine Cinate on Unsplash I have always looked for myself in other people. I think the idea was that they would somehow hold the pieces of me that I felt were missing. That maybe, if I wrapped my identity up in theirs enough, we would somehow make a whole person. It's not healthy to live like this, but I did it anyway — burning through relationships and searching for something I couldn't quite name. It was never enough, not to be myself, but it was never enough to latch my identity to other people, either. I got close, several times — I thought I had reached the pinnacle of self discovery. I thought I had completed myself. But in the end, relying on other people to help build yourself is never a viable way to do things. It's only recently that I've started to become comfortable with the idea of being enough, as I am, on my own. Several years ago, in this same position, I would have searched for another person to attach my identity onto,

What’s Up? (The Sky ... Ha ... Ha)

Hey, everyone. I know it's been a while since you heard from me. I just wanted to write to you and explain why I've been so absent.

So, this year, my chronic pain has not been kind. There have been lots of ups and downs. I started a new headache medicine, but with that, there have been some side effects and adjustments. I've also been shifting some other medicine around, and because of that, my pain has worsened. My headaches have been lessened, but I've had a ton of overall body aches and I've just been feeling like crap, to put it oh-so-eloquently. Because of this, I've been mostly focusing on getting through each day and only doing what I absolutely have to.

This has all been in January and February (though probably all through the last few months of 2016 as well). So then, starting in March, I got a cold that lasted for a while, then went away for two days before I promptly got sick again. (Haha, that was nice.) That cold lasted for like, three weeks until my mom finally handed me a Claritin and said, "Here! Try this." So, I did. And it kind of helped, but I'm still dealing with some sickness, and I'm still dealing with the pain.

But, I missed blogging! So here I am. I'll be putting up at least one post in the next week or two, hopefully. I'll try to get back into the swing of things. Stay tuned. And keep your head up, lovelies. It's all going to be all right. ♥

How's life for you?


When I dressed up and took this photo and actually felt alive for the first time in weeks; I also did my best impression(s) of Ronald Weasley.

P. S. Don't hate me for the pun in the title. I kind of hate it a little bit too, but I had to.

Comments

  1. I hope you feel better soon! We've missed you!

    ReplyDelete
  2. (Excuse me that title pun is the BEST.)

    Aww, I'm sending hugs and good thoughts to you, Sky. <3 I'm sorry things are like this and I really hope the colds give you a break and the medication all settles down soon. You're truly amazing!! *sends hugs*

    ReplyDelete
  3. *tackle hugs* I HAVE MISSED YOU. I am sooooo sorry your health has been so rude to you lately! D: Ugh. That is the worst. I'm praying for you, girl. <3

    (And I'm actually in love with the title. I love puns. XD)

    ReplyDelete
  4. So glad you are feeling better. Who doesn't love a good pun.

    ReplyDelete

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