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note to self: i’ll be there for you, always

written june 6, 2021. Photo by Kristine Cinate on Unsplash I have always looked for myself in other people. I think the idea was that they would somehow hold the pieces of me that I felt were missing. That maybe, if I wrapped my identity up in theirs enough, we would somehow make a whole person. It's not healthy to live like this, but I did it anyway — burning through relationships and searching for something I couldn't quite name. It was never enough, not to be myself, but it was never enough to latch my identity to other people, either. I got close, several times — I thought I had reached the pinnacle of self discovery. I thought I had completed myself. But in the end, relying on other people to help build yourself is never a viable way to do things. It's only recently that I've started to become comfortable with the idea of being enough, as I am, on my own. Several years ago, in this same position, I would have searched for another person to attach my identity onto,...
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R. I. P. Narniagirl

Once upon a time, there was a blog called Further Up and Further In.

But it was not the Further Up and Further In that you are thinking of. No... it was a completely different blog, set in a completely different place in time. This blog was run by Narniagirl, a girl you may not think you know but whom you actually do.

That Further Up and Further In (FUFI) blog came into the world in 2006, and was faithfully upkept until the land that the blog lived in was destroyed, making way for new things. Narniagirl was destitute. She searched for a place to go, and found a place where many of her friends had relocated. She set up housekeeping there in a small private cottage, and then opened up to the world, naming it FUFI just like her old home. Narniagirl herself however wanted a somewhat fresh start, so she renamed herself. Her name is now Sky, and she is typing this post at this very moment.

Although Narniagirl and the old FUFI hold fond memories, Sky is now moving on to a future full of bright hopes and many dreams. Narniagirl is a thing of the past, and she will be missed. But do not think of her with sorrow. Think of her as a wonderful memory that will live on... in the form of Sky. We will miss Narniagirl, but she is not dead! She is still around, just by a different name. (Me, people, that would be me.)

So, with that thought, R.I.P., Narniagirl.
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  1. Miss EyebrightSeptember 24, 2010 at 10:47 PM

    **is touched** She was such an amazing person, that Narniagirl. She will be greatly missed. ;)

    Glad you posted, Sky!

    ReplyDelete
  2. TarissaSeptember 25, 2010 at 10:03 AM

    No! Narniagirl is gone!.... *sobs*

    Oh well, I'm sure this new girl Sky will replace her equally as great...
    =D

    ReplyDelete

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